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Yep! That’s right, you read that title correctly. Your single status isn’t the problem. How you look at your circumstance is. How you look and view where your life is at is the problem. I betcha, you’re thinking that you absolutely need a boyfriend, that you can’t survive without one and that’s okay to feel that way. But that feeling should go away because truth is, you don’t need, you want. You CAN survive and you will.
How you ask? Well, for starters, a change in perspective. You’re looking at your circumstances in a negative way and that is unhealthy. Let us take a 360 and change that perspective and look at it positively. What if, we all looked at singleness as a blessing. It is truly a blessing to be single. This way, we have more time to turn our attention to God. We are able to learn more from our creator and tune in to what he wants for your life. God wants us to use this time to spend time with him. “He is jealous for me”. He wants us and all of us, and that includes your full undivided attention.
Now, keep in mind though, it is okay to like someone. It is OKAY to want a relationship. I know I want a relationship someday. The problem comes in when you allow that crush to consume your mind. When you allow a person to over take your mind and that person is the only thing you think about and the only thing you want. It becomes a problem when you chase a guy or girl instead of our Lord and Savior. It took a LONG time for God to change my heart and to become content in this area. But He did, and He can help you also if you allow him to work through you. So, your single status isn’t the problem, what you allow to consume your mind is.
If you’re young and looking for love, can you honestly say that you know yourself? Do you know what YOU, yourself wants to achieve in life? Where you want to go in life? What God has revealed to you for YOUR life?
What if God is using this time to prepare you to do something great? To mold you and shape you? What if, instead of seeking love, you allow God to write your love story? If God wants to use this time to make you realize that your single status isn’t the problem. God is a good author after all and He has written a big book that is still popular today, aka, THE BIBLE. I’m pretty sure He’s got a good plot outline for your life right now.
But, your love story won’t turn to the next chapter until you learn about yourself and you learn about the Father who made you. God is the perfect Father and wants an intimate relationship with you. He created you after all. He knows you so well that he has the hairs on your head numbered (Luke 12:7) and he knows your every thought before you even think it (Psalms 139). Even though God knows you this well doesn’t mean we shouldn’t talk to him. He wants to talk with you. He wants for you to know him and for you to feel and know that you’re loved by him. The perfect Father who knows you this well will be able to write your love story, but right now, this is the time to be content.
Now is the time to become who YOU want to become. Now is the time to make sure you are the person that you would want to date yourself. As Andy Stanley would put it in his “Relationships and Dating Series” on book or sermon series, “Become the person your looking for is looking for”. In other words, become who you would want to date yourself. Becoming content with where you are in life gives more peace than worrying about if that one guy is the perfect one for you because in reality, no one is perfect.
However, God orchestrates everything together so much that your plan will fit together with another person’s plan. It won’t be perfect, and it won’t be the same. God works when you realize that your single status isn’t the problem. How you react to it is.
So, I challenge you to get to know The God who made Heaven and Earth and who made you and me. Get to know yourself and who you are without having to form to a guy or girls standards. Become who you would want to date yourself. Become content with where you are because it is a blessing.
May your day Sparkle,